Twisted Holiday
by Temperance-is -a -virtue
Summary: Hopefully a few oneshots that focus on Christmas, but are all a little twisted.In Number Six, Jack's cousin has a BIG favour to ask. In Number Eight, the squints are toys!
1. Chapter 1

Oh, what a twisted brain I have developed! Well, not developed, it was there all along. I just didn't access it. Now, I have decided to unleash its power!

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Bones. I think I do the characters justice most of the time. (Me bragging) 

**A BIG BEAR**

He was walking down the hallway, humming the song that he heard on the radio. It was by some Jamaican singer, and he was talking about giving his love completely to a girl. Well, Seely didn't know anything about _that_, but the song was very nice.

"Take my love; take it all, my everything I give it to you…" he was only slightly surprised at how easy it was to learn the words.

He reached her apartment and knocked.

"Please take full control of my heart…"

"Coming!"

He heard something fall from behind the door. Followed by muffled curse words and another crash.

_What on earth was going on in there?_

"Who is it?" she said.

"It's me Bones. You okay in there?"

"Yes Booth, hold on"

In another minute, she was swinging the door open.

"Hey, Bones just came to see you before I left on my ski trip with Par…"

But while the sight of her in a tiny pair of shorts and a worn out T-shirt that fully emphasized her lack of undergarment were distraction enough, the sight behind her was a little bit more amazing.

"What on earth?"

"It's a giant teddy bear. I got it as an early Christmas present from an admirer."

"An admirer of what?" he looked at the giant bear that was almost as tall as her apartment.

"I have no clue. It wasn't signed, but I have a feeling it is one of the people that I worked with when I was putting together the treat for those children at the orphanage for Christmas who sent it to me. The men who worked at the toy factory took a liking to me for some reason."

_If they saw you how you are now Bones they would be hooked on you. Not that I am._

"So, what are you gonna do with this big fella?" he asked as he took the same route she did- between the wall and the bear's butt- to get to the other side of her apartment.

"The note said that in it is my actual present. So I have to open it up. Do you want to help?"

"Your actual present is inside?" Seely asked her.

"That is what the note says. Apparently this is something new that they have now. You encase presents in a giant teddy bear and the person who receives it opens it up. I think it is supposed to present more of a shock to the recipient. I was definitely surprised to recieve it."

"I can bet." Seely looked up at the big bear, "So let's pop this bad boy open."

…………………………………………

After hours of rifling through the pounds of package peanuts and bubble wrap that came inside the bear, they unearthed several things. There was a ridiculously large box of chocolates, a cuddlier smaller and nicer looking bear, some Christmas themed T-shirts, a box of CD's, tree lights, a tiny Christmas tree with and accompanying decorations, microwave popcorn, a box of perfume, a bottle of wine, candles and- Bones had a laughing fit- a pair of sneakers that looked identical to the ones Booth was wearing.

But it was the last two things that she pulled out of the bear that had her mind working overtime.

The first was a box that contained a beautiful necklace, made with chunky blue beads and had a pendant made of coral cut into the shape of a flower. It was beautiful.

Temperance wondered if the person who sent this was very close to her. Close enough to know exactly what she would like…

The last gift confirmed it.

It was a pig. A plush pig that was big enough to cuddle when you were missing a certain person's embrace when they went away on vacation.

"Wow, Bones, whoever this guy is, he wants you to really enjoy your Christmas."

Temperance looked over at Booth, wanting to hit him and hug him at the same time.

"And hopefully he knows that I'm grateful for the kind gesture, even if the bear is a bit much."

He smiled, "Come on, I'll help you to pop and string your popcorn."

He took up the boxes of popcorn and headed towards her kitchen.

She shook her head. Seely Booth was full of surprises.

She cleaned up the mess, listening to him singing as he popped the popcorn.

"Take my love; take it all…my everything I give it to you. Please take full control …take my wings and fly away…"

 So, how twisted was that? Sneakers? A giant bear? WTF? Anyway, I hope you review.

I'm starting this early because I may not be able to come online in December. I'm going to my Grandparents (yay!) for the holiday and they don't have Internet.

The song is 'Take my Love" by Christopher Martin. I don't expect you to know it. It was playing in my head as I was reading fan fictions and thinking about Christmas. Thus the story.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, so the twisted is in here, but it may be a little hard to see. Angela and Brennan are fighting. I hope I do this right. 

"Bitch!"

It was the first thing he heard as he walked into the Medico – Legal lab. The first thing he _saw_ almost made his heart stop.

A large book flew across the room in an arc and hit his partner in the back.

Bones spun around, murder in her eyes.

"Oh so you are going to be that puerile about this, huh? Well, fine Angela; call me when you feel like an adult again!"

"Newsflash, Brennan, I am your best friend, at least for the moment, and I should come at least second in your life! You should be there for me when I need you! And you deserve more than a dictionary! I should have thrown the damn desk!"

"Ange, I know you are well aware that I can break you in half so stop throwing things at me!"

"I'M THROWING BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO COME BACK HERE AND FIGHT LIKE A MAN!"

"OH, NO YOU DON"T!"

"OH YES I DO!"

"STOP SHOUTING!"

"I'LL DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT!"

What the hell was going on here? Bones and Angela didn't fight! Well, not like this. Bones was currently walking up to the platform where Angela was standing, swiping the card so roughly that it denied her access.

"You are such a little spoiled princess, Angela, a real piece of work!" said Bones, "Shouting and throwing things at me because I won't come to your stupid Christmas party!"

"There it is again! Why is it stupid? Because it's my party? You know, you always do that! And why do you refuse to come Bren? All we are gonna do is toast the holiday, drink a bit, have a good time! What, are you allergic to fun? Don't you wanna do stuff with me anymore?"

"I _said_ I have work to do!"

"No, you don't! You just want an excuse to not come to my party! You are a selfish bitch, Bren, I'm telling you straight!"

Angela threw a sketch pad this time. And a pen. And also her bag. Because her aim was off, the projectiles only served to make Bones even angrier.

"Angela, you are being inconsiderate! You spring this party on me ten minutes ago and I'm supposed to drop everything and go? That isn't fair! And you act as if we don't see each other everyday any way! What more do you want from me, an appendage?"

With one almighty tug, she put the card through the scanner and it granted her access. She was up the stairs and poking Angela in the chest in a few seconds.

"Sometimes you need to think about me, Angela!"

"WELL, YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT ME!"

"ANGELA, I CAN'T COME TO YOUR PARTY! I HAVE MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO DO!"

"IF YOU DON'T COME, I WON'T EVER FORGIVE YOU!"

"WELL, THAT IS A RISK I'M WILLING TO TAKE!"

What Angela was about to say died in her throat, "What?"

Booth could hear her sob from where he stood, frozen in shock.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?"  
"I-I'm sorry Angela, I didn't mean it like that."

"Like hell you didn't! You know what, Bren? This, all this," Angela waved a hand between them to indicate, "It is now officially over! You are out of my life! Don't come to my wedding, don't talk to me, and don't even look at me! We are through! Don't touch me!"

"Angela!"

"I mean it, Bren! I never ever wanna see you again!"

"We work together!"

"Well, I may just change that! Goodbye, Brennan! Have a friggin' lousy Christmas!"

She stomped off the platform, her shoes pounding the floor almost enough to put dents in it.

"Fine, go then! I don't need you!" Bones shouted, "I'll be better off without you!"

She stopped as a sob came to her throat.

She turned to see Booth, his mouth open, catching flies.

"What the hell are you looking at?" she said as a tear streamed down her face.

 Okay, that didn't come out as planned.

I wanted it to be a bit funny. We did something like this when I was in Drama class in high school. Two friends were having a fight and it sounded like they were breaking up, and everyone was laughing. Oh, well.


	3. Chapter 3

Don't worry, people, Brennan and Angela's relationship is as strong as ever. I was just thinking that I have never seen them fight, and the idea came to me. But I will try to fix it, like some of you requested, I will just put this in first, to cheer you all back up. Hodgins takes centre stage in this one, and we find out he is related to some really interesting people.

**Disclaimer:** I wish I could get it for Christmas, but… 

"Merry Christmas, baby."

"Merry Christmas to you, too. Oh, don't open that one, open this one."

Hodgins was sitting under the Christmas tree with Angela. They had agreed to open one present each on Christmas Eve, Angela justifying it by saying that it was a 'preview' for the real thing. They were about to take up the presents they had chosen to open when they heard a knock on the front door.

"Who the heck could that be?" Hodgins asked. Nobody had ever made the trek up the quarter mile driveway to the estate, and the intercom would have alerted them if any cars were coming so that they could open the gate.

"Maybe something just hit the door." Angela suggested.

"It didn't sound like it." Hodgins got up off the floor and Angela joined him. The knock came again.

"That was definitely a knock"

Suddenly the person spoke.

"Come on, you knucklehead, I'm freezing out here!"

"Oh, I know who it is!" said Hodgins, "But he isn't supposed to- he's supposed to be working tonight!"

"Who is he?" Angela asked.

"A distant cousin. He and I grew up together, but then he moved north to take over his family's business."

"Jackie, I know you're in there! And you're awake too!"

"_Jackie_!" a smile erupted on Angela's face.

"I told him not to call me that!" Hodgins walked towards the door and flung it open. "How many times have I told you not to call me that?"

Angela felt her bottom jaw hit the floor. It was a man in a Santa costume, but not any normal costume, this one had glittering lights that seemed to shine all around him. He had an honest, trustworthy face that didn't have the traditional white beard but a bit of white stubble that actually made him look handsome _a la_ House. He didn't have a pot belly either. A reindeer was suspended in midair behind him.

"Aw, come on, cuz, we have been calling each other those names since ever. You expect me to stop because you ask me to? I'm Benji, you're Jackie. It isn't gonna change. Hey, Angela."

"Huh- what the…" was all Angela could manage to say.

"Angie, this is my cousin, Benjamin Claus. He is the new CEO of Claus Enterprises. They make toys."

"Okay," said Angela, her mouth still open.

"Nice to meet you formally, Miss Montenegro. I'm glad that you're not just a file to me anymore, not that my cousin who you're marrying has tried to change that," he stepped over the threshold and extended his gloved hand toward her. She shook it and stared.

"Hey, don't let Prancer follow you in here. He ate the carpet last time he did," Hodgins said as calmly as ever, leading his cousin into the house. Angela was still staring at Benjamin as he passed her.

"So, Jackie, explain to me again why I was not invited to your wedding," Benjamin came in and took off his boots.

"No you first. Explain to me why you are here when you are supposed to be out working!"

"I'm almost done. Only Asia left. I can chill out here for the rest of the night, spend time with you and Angela and just make the elves do it. I got a guy out there, Mendez; he'd flip if I let him run the show for a bit."

"You're Santa!"

They looked up at Angela who was staring at Benjamin as if he had turned green suddenly.

Benjamin looked at Hodgins, "You mean to tell me you haven't told her? You didn't tell her that you're related to the Claus family?"

"That sort of stuff gets you thrown in the asylum down here, Benji, remember?" said Hodgins, "Don't you remember when you told that teacher in high school about Uncle Simon's sleigh. She told your parents to get you shrinked."

"But you're Santa?" Angela said again, "Like Santa Santa? With the reindeer and everything?"

"Yes, Angela, and yes I got your list. I did manage to get the limited edition Prada bag for you, though the dream wedding is gonna be taken care of by my cousin here. Oh, hang on, let me get Raymond down here with your presents," he took out a cell phone from his pocket and called his elf.

"Hey, man, I hope you didn't park on my lawn again." Hodgins went to a nearby window to check, "Crap! Why can't you park on the roof like the guys on TV do?"

"I'm marrying into a family of Santa's?" Angela said softly.

When Benjamin came off the phone, he turned to Angela, "So, a forensic artist, huh? That's not a very popular field."

"Y-you're right," Angela stuttered, still not believing she was talking to Santa Claus, "Not a lot of people."

"My wife is in a field like that, Elf Matchmaker. If I didn't do this, I would have been a writer. But, you know, the business is good, and it really is nice to be paid in smiles. But your friend Temperance Brennan, she does very well. I like her books. Smart, that woman. But she never asks us for anything. But she gets a Nice report almost every year. Her file is like this big." Benjamin indicated with his hands, "All the moving around, you know."

Angela nodded, suddenly realizing she liked Hodgins' cousin, apart from the fact that he was Santa Claus, "Tell me about Zach's file."

"He doesn't believe in Santa, but, you know he never spoils it for his siblings and cousins who do. He helps them put out cookies and milk- which is unnecessary, please pass on the message- and he watches them fall asleep when they want to stay up and wait for me. He's a great guy."

Angela sat beside Benjamin, "What about Booth?"

"You know that guy gets on my nerves. He keeps asking us for the same thing every year when it is right there in front of him! One thing with Claus Enterprises, we don't give you stuff you already have."

What does he keep asking for?" Jack asked.

Benjamin smiled at him, "Don't act as if I haven't told you!"

Jack laughed, "Booth is so sprung!"

Angela was too fascinated by Benjamin to notice what they were talking about, "What about my file?"

Benjamin smiled, "Now that one is interesting. You would have gotten so many Naughty's in your file, but my uncle, who was Santa before me, decided to give you Nice almost every year because you have such a big generous heart."

"Really? Thank your uncle for me."

"He's in Cozumel on retirement, but I'm sure I can pass the message along," Benjamin's phone rang, "Oh, no. This text says that Mendez is freaking out about the flight. I'll just have to go. Hey man, see you later."

The two cousins hugged before Benjamin turned to hug Angela, "Don't be a stranger. Oh and your present."

Like magic, the bag appeared from behind Angela's back.

"Oh! Thank you Santa!"

"Hey, we're family. Skip the formalities. It's Benjamin."

He left them at the door, watching him get back into his sleigh. The reindeer were already ready and so were the elves. He waved goodbye as the sleigh flew higher and higher and finally was out of their sight.

Hodgins hugged Angela around her waist, "So you like my cousin?"

Angela smiled, "Who doesn't? He's Santa."

 I hope that made you feel better.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** Dude I don't, but _dude_ if I _did_!

**MEDICO-LEGAL SNOW**

Brennan entered the lab, sidestepping the pile of white snow near the door. She looked at the white stuff in dismay.

Oh no. They actually did it.

"WOO HOO!"

Brennan jumped out of the way as Hodgins flew past her on a sled.

"Cam is not going to be happy about this!" Brennan shouted after him as he went sliding all the way to the end of the lab.

"Luckily she's gone! She won't be back until tomorrow morning!" said Angela who Brennan could see was making a snow angel in the artificial snow, "Come on, Bren! Join us!"

"I have work to do." Brennan walked toward her office, passing Zach and a few other lab workers making large snowballs behind a fort.

She went to her office, closing her door against the noise of the snowball fight that started.

She typed a new chapter for her book and did some paper work, not admitting to herself that she was waiting for a certain person to walk through the-

"Hey, Bones."

She hid the smile of delight that threatened to spring to her face as she looked up to see him. He had flecks of white over his suit and a smile that could melt a glacier on his lips.

"Why aren't you in the snowball fight?"

"As you can see, Booth, I'm too busy to romp in the snow right now," Brennan answered, "Plus, I do not think Cam would approve."

"She won't be in all afternoon, Bones, you heard her!"

"So?"

"Come on! Let's roll around in the snow!"  
He did a funny little dance and she couldn't help it. She smiled.

"Is that a yes?'

"It's an 'I have work to do and so do you, but that was a _really_ funny dance'. I'm not playing in any snow, artificial or otherwise, today."

"You can't tell me you don't wanna ditch work and go play in the snow," he walked around her desk and stood beside her. Brennan ignored him, "Look. It has the added bonus of not melting and not being too cold. See? Feel it."

Before she realized what he was doing, a handful of snow hit her in the face.

"Ah! Booth, you are such a child!"

By the time she wiped it off her face he was almost out the door.

She ran down the hall after him. As she reached where all the squints had been playing in the snow before, she heard him shout, "Now! Do it now!"

Snow hit her from all directions. It was not as cold as actual snow, nor as wet, but it gave her the same feeling of wild abandon that plying in real snow did.

"Bullseye!" she heard Jack shout.

"I can't believe all of you!" she screamed. She looked up at the landing and saw the entire staff of the Medico-Legal lab grinning down at her, "You all had better come back down here, so I can get my revenge!"

They cheered loudly and headed back downstairs. The snowball fight resumed, followed by sled rides and snowman making contests. They were having so much fun they didn't see the time pass by.

"What on earth is this?!"

They all froze and looked towards the door where Cam stood, her eyes wide in shock.

"I turn my back for two minutes and you people break out the fake snow? Who is gonna clear up this mess? Don't you all have work to…?"

She stopped as a large snowball hit her in the chest.

"Who threw that?"

Everybody looked around to see Brennan, her hand raised and a smile on her face.

"Dr, Brennan," Cam looked at her, almost in disappointment, "did you just dare to throw snow at me?"

"Yes. Yes I did."

Everyone was surprised to see Cam grin, take off her shoes and pick up a handful of snow.

"Oh, you are _so_ gonna get it!"

 This is usually the time of year when I thank heavens I don't live in a cold country. If I'm so cold here in the Tropics around Christmas time, I would freeze my butt off in a cold country!

Is it not a nice image? All the squints playing in the snow…that is so cute… (daydreaming)


	5. Chapter 5

You know one way to tell that you're way too busy? You for get to prepare for Christmas. I am definitely in that spot right now. I'm trying to make up for it by pooling my twisted ideas quickly so I can wite some before I go off to Grandparent's for the holiday. Here's a wee short one.

* * *

"Im sick and tired of all this ice!"

Angela stepped into the Jeffersonian Medico-Legal Lab, shrugging out of her large blue jacket. She dragged off her wool cap and unwound her scarf from around her neck, kicking off her boots and peeling off at least three pairs of socks, leaving one on.

"When will this stupid ice just melt already?" she wailed.

"Well, seeing as we're in the middle of an Ice Age, Ange, the ice will probably be around for a good long while."

A very warm and dry Dr. Brennan walked up to her best friend, holding up a coffee mug, which Angela refused.

"I can't take it Bren!" Angela complained, "Usually I'm all for Winter Wonderlands, but it's only been a year of this Ice Age thing and already I just wanna pack it up and move to South America!"

"Well, Hodgins already left," said Brennan, looking around at Hodgins' old desk which was now occupied by someone else, "And I guess that's where Cam wants to go too."

"Lucky them! I only wish them the best of luck!" Angela said bitterly.

"It looks like everybody who wants to leave is making plans to. It is the Christmas holidays and Booth and Parker will be leaving for Australia tomorrow..."

"It's Christmas?"

Brennan looked at her friend. Angela had been so upset over the Ice Age that she had forgotten about Christmas. It was not something that usually happened to Angela. She loved Christmas.

"It's a week away, Angela," Brennan told her. Her eyes went wide with excitement.

"Oh gosh! I gotta go buy presents! I have to mail Christmas cards. First I'll have to get some. I have to send Hodgins a present, decorate my house, get a tree, buy those earrings you said you liked, buy snow tires..."

"They only sell snow tires now, Ange," Brennan reminded her. She was enjoying the transformation on Angela's face.

"Oh, right. And I gotta find presents quickly for Booth and Parker, before they leave. Cam's present can wait a little, she's leaving next month. Then I gotta go visit Zach and bring him a nice sweater, and maybe some cookies. Then I need to buy Dad something..."

She started ticking off her fingers, mumbling and smiling as she walked to her office, looking much happier than she had in a while. Brennan smiled as she heard Angela bust out a carol. She was just happy that her friend was herself again.

* * *

Hope you like. Send a review along!


	6. Chapter 6

Not my fault it's late! I went to No Internet Land (ie. grandparents' house) for Christmas.

Disclaimer: If I owned it, maybe Jack really would be related to Santa.

* * *

"Merry Christmas!" Hodgins shouted to Dr. Saroyan, watching her drive off, smiling and waving goodbye. He turned to his own car, whistling a carol and feeling pretty good. In fact, he felt the best he had in a long time. Jamming the key into the lock, he glanced over the top and saw somebody looking at him. More like staring.

"Hey," Angela said.

"Uhhh...hi," Hodgins said back, "How are you gonna spend the holiday?"

She shrugged, "Roxy and I are going to visit my dad."

"Oh," damn did he hate Roxy, "Ok. See you after the holidays."

"Yeah."

They were about to climb into their cars, when a bright light from down the line of cars caught their eye. It seemed to be coming from a snow-white SUV, which was ambling towards them. They eyed each other, and looked again at the strange car, till Hodgins, in realization, said, "Benji?"

"You don't think it's him, do you?" Angela asked, "He's working tonight."

"I know that flashy gas guzzler anywhere. Benji!" he ran up to the slowing car, "Man, what are you doing here _another _Christmas Eve?"

"You don't sound like you're happy to see me, Jackie," Benjamin got out of his car, but to Angela's surprise, he was in a pair of jeans, a red jacket and white shirt.

"What's going on?" she asked him, "Did something happen? Is there gonna be no Christmas this year? What about the little boys and girls who won't get their presents?"

Benjamin looked at her like she had tree growing from her nose, "What are you talking about? Christmas is on, as always."

Angela blushed, "Sorry. Just watched one too many Christmas specials."

Benjamin looked at Jack, "How you made her get away, I have no idea," he looked back at Angela, "And you. I have a few choice words for you, but those can wait until Jack's out of earshot."

"Okay, why are you here?" Jack asked, wondering what Benjamin could possibly have to tell Angela.

Benjamin put his hands in his pockets, "I got a favour to ask. If you can't then that's fine."

Jack scrunched up his face, "Why do I have a feeling I know what this is? Is it what I think it is?"

"Exactly. Please, Jack. You know I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."

"What happened?"

"It's Chelsea. She's in labour."

Angela watched Jack's eyes go wide in shock, "What? Well, of course I'll help you out, man! It's just that I never really liked that thing."

"Wait, what are we talking about? Who's Chelsea?" Angela asked.

"Chelsea is my wife. She's gonna have a baby," Benjamin said proudly, "That's why I need Jackie here to help me out and deliver the presents tonight. I can't just leave the elves to do whatever. So you gonna help me out Jackie?" he asked his cousin.

"Wow, Hodgins, you get to be Santa?" Angela said, impressed.

Jack nodded, "Um, sure. I'll help out."

Benjamin smiled, "I knew I could count on you, man."

"You never told me your cousin was pregnant!" Angela hit Jack on the shoulder with the back of her hand.

"Come on. We gotta get back quickly," Benjamin opened the door for Jack to get in, "Angela you coming?"

"Me?" Angela pointed at herself," Isn't this like a family thing?"

"Not really. But you know, Roxy could be waiting up for you," Jack said from the passenger seat.

"She isn't. She fell asleep two minutes ago," Benjamin informed her. Angela opened the door and got into the seat behind Hodgins.

"Wow. In here smells like hot chocolate," Angela commented, closing the door.

"I was drinking some earlier. Buckle up. I'm going to have to speed a little to get back in time," Benjamin started up the SUV.

"Dude, can't you get a smaller car?" Jack asked as they took off, the car going so fast that all Angela could see out the window were a blur of lights.

"Dude, you have your thing, I have mine," Benjamin answered.

Angela giggled, "Santa just said 'dude'."

"We're almost there," Benjamin announced only fifteen minutes later.

"What?" Angela exclaimed, "There is no way we reached the North Pole already!"

"Of course not. We're not going to the factory," said Jack, "We're going to the airport."

"Where's the airport?" she asked him.

"Alaska."

"Oh," Angela nodded, trying to believe, "So we only crossed Canada and ended up on the West Coast in less than half hour. Gee, I'm really out of my element."

"We're here," said Benjamin, slowing to a stop. Angela looked out the window and her mouth opened in shock. There in front of her eyes, was a large mansion, with red-brown bricks, fluffy white snow and red and green decorations all around. Behind the mansion, a large cargo plane touched down.

"This is the airport?" she asked the cousins.

"It's a private airport," they told her.

"It looks like a gingerbread house. Deluxe sized."

"Oh, that's just the decorations. The rest of the year, it looks like a regular old mansion," Jack explained, "It's his grandmother's house.

"Wow."

They walked up to the front door. Jack and Benjamin walked through it, totally comfortable. Angela was a little more cautious.

Inside the foyer, it looked just like a regular house, decorated for Christmas. Holly was wrapped around the banister. And large pots of poinsettias stood in the corners of the room. It felt warm and cozy.

"I gotta get upstairs to the hospital wing. Chelsea's up there. From now on, you guys are in charge. Harrison will be around soon to tell you what you need to do." Benjamin ran up the stairs.

"Benjamin!"

He stopped as both of them called his name.

"You go first," Jack told Angela.

"I was just gonna say good luck. I hope everything goes okay."

"Tell Chelsea were rooting for her," Jack held up a fist of solidarity.

"Thanks. Hey, man, take her over Paris," with that, Benjamin ran the rest of the way up the stairs.

"I'm not driving that thing," Jack mumbled.

"Aw come on, Hodgins, you gotta!" Angela shouted, "It's _Santa's sleigh_! It's like an honour!"

"If you feel that way, you can drive," Jack said miserably.

"Hey Jack."

They turned and saw a short, pretty woman with jet black hair, a nice smile and a green and red blazer over her black pants suit.

"Harrison?!" Jack shouted, hugging the lady and lifting her a little, "As in Debbie Harrison? Gosh, how long has it been?"

"You tell me!" she hit him in the chest, "I have to hear from Mr. Claus everything that's happening with you. He hardly knows himself! Hi, I'm Debbie," she held out her hand for Angela to shake, "Don't mind us. We used to go out."

"Are you an elf?" Angela asked, trying not to hold the shared ex thing against Debbie.

The other woman smiled patiently, "It's a misnomer. The elves you hear about in stories and such? We don't really know if they're real."

"Yes they are," said Hodgins.

Debbie glared at him, then looked back at Angela, "And could you tell your girlfriend to lay off the wishing? We get it, she wants you to stay, blah blah," Debbie imitated a mouth with her fingers, "Come on, you two, your flight's scheduled to leave soon."

"Hey, do we get to wear Santa suits?" Angela asked as they climbed into an elevator on the other side of the foyer.

"If you want to, sure. We can get some threads for you," Debbie answered.

"Yes!" Angela did a victory dance, making Jack chuckle.

The doors opened and revealed an air traffic control room, with elves on the equipment. Angela gasped as she looked through the glass and down to see a small runway and- her mouth opened in awe- Santa's sleigh. The plane she had seen earlier was parked on a larger runway and it looked like it was being unloaded.

"You guys can go through there and change into whatever you like" Debbie pointed to a door. Angela and Jack obeyed her orders.

Angela came back out a few minutes later, dressed and ready and filled with mirth.

"Oh gosh, are these Chelsea's stuff?" she glanced down at the Christmas themed clothes she had on; a red dress with white trimming, red leggings, white boots and a warm, fluffy white hoodie with a red snowflake print, "They are so cool! I wish I could keep them."

"You can," said Debbie, "That's not Mrs. Claus' personal closet."

"Awesome," Angela brushed off the sleeve of her new hoodie.

"Damn, you look good," Debbie looked past Angela and smiled, "But you gotta wear the hat."

"I don't wanna wear the hat!" Jack protested. Angela turned around and folded her arms at him.

"Hodgins!"

"What?" Jack had on a red jacket over a white hoodie and a red t shirt, black jeans and boots."

"No! Go back! You gotta put on the suit!"

"I don't wanna put on the suit!" he protested, "I think I look great."

"You do." Debbie told im.

"You're just being stubborn," Angela pouted.

"Come on. We better get you guys moving," Debbie ushered them down a flight of stairs which led to the small runway. Angela gasped.

"I still can't believe reindeer exist!" she shouted, going up to one and patting it.

"Of course they exist. Don't you watch the Discovery Channel?" Debbie asked.

"I think she means flying reindeer, Debbie," Jack told her, "And they kinda don't. These guys have some special in them, but I'm not at liberty to say what it is."

Angela watched as the reindeer she was petting rose himself off the ground several inches.

Debbie put on a pair of earmuffs, "You guys get ready for takeoff. Felix! Martin! Chang! McKenzie! Get down here, we're ready!"

"Oh, wow, this is so exciting!" Angela was bouncing on the soles of her feet, "Aren't you excited, Hodgins?"

"He isn't," said Debbie, "He hates flying the sleigh. It's a bi family thing, I'm sure he'll tell you sometime."

"Let's get in," Jack escorted Angela to the sleigh and away from Debbie. He didn't remember her knowing him so well. He helped Angela ste up and get seated, then he slid in beside her.

Four elves in blazers like Debbie's came down the stairs and climbed in the back of the sleigh.

"Angela, Jack, this is Janet Chang, Justin Felix, Dre Martin and Sammy McKenzie. They'll be your elves on the flight. If you're all ready?...Alright. Jack you know what to do."

Angela, fully expecting Jack to announce, "On Dasher, On Dancer..." was surprised when he gave the reigns a wiggle, and the reindeer pulled the craft with them.

"I think I'm equal parts surprised and disappointed," she said as they taxied down the runway.

"Imagine how I felt when I came to work the first day!" said Sammy.

"Hold on," Jack said as the reindeer rose off the runway.

"Wow!" Angela shouted as they flew into the air.

"Dr. Hodgins, sir you're going the wrong way," Justin pointed out, "Mr. Claus always starts with Europe first, and you're going towards Asia."

"Benji should get a GPS for this thing," Jack muttered, turning the sleigh the way Justin indicated, "He said I should take you to Paris, Angie? I guess our first stop is France."

"We usually start with England," said Janet. Angela giggled as Jack glared at Janet.

They went to London first, passing over the Parliamentary building. Angela whipped out a digital camera from nowhere and started snapping off pictures. The others stared at her.

"What? I wont show them to anybody!"

They stopped at the first town. Nobody was on the street. Angela slid out of the sleigh and admired the decorations on the houses and lawns. Then Dre pushed a stack of presents in her hands.

"You can take that side of the road with Sammy and Justin," he said.

"Huh?" she really never expected to have to actually do anything. She watched as Sammy went up to a door, and pushed the present right through it. The present melted through the wood like the ghost of Christmas past.

"Be careful," Jack told her as he moved off with a stack of presents to the first house on the side of the street they were on. Janet and Dre followed him.

Guessing that they would nee all the help they could get anyway, Angela moved to assist.

"What time is it?" Justin asked.

"Um, 9:15, but that's DC time," Angela told him. She hoped Roxy hadn't noticed she was missing.

"Good. We'll be back early. I wanna start watching the DVD's I got for Christmas."

They delivered presents to town after town in the big cities and small towns and villages, and even to remote houses. The really exciting part was flying over the great cities of the world, the big continents and small islands, but the actual work was very monotonous and tedious.

Their last stop on the tour was Canada. They landed in the parking lot of a high rise apartment building.

"What time is it?" Justin asked.

"Um, 10:45 DC time...wait! That can't be right!" Angela tapped her watch.

"These things tend to go fast," Jack told her, "Because it's a high rise, we'll have to go in."

"What if somebody sees us?" she asked him.

"Don't worry, nobody's awake in there. Only a cat." Jack took a pile of presents and made to walk off.

"Whoa!"

He stopped, "What?"

"Did you just do the Santa thing? You, know, sees when you're sleeping, knows when you're awake?"

Jack shrugged, "I guess I did."

They delivered the last of the presents and hopped back into the sleigh, making their way back to the airport.

As they touched down, they were met with applause. Jack hopped out first, and was met by a beaming Debbie.

"You did great, Jack. I don't know why you still hate flying the sleigh. You're a natural."

"How's Chelsea?" Jack asked, walking beside Debbie up the stairs.

"She's doing fine. They're in the middle of it now. Your cousin wants a girl, but I have a feeling it's going to be a boy."

Angela followed them to the traffic control room, where there was a little celebration going on. She got food and drink pushed into her hands and she ate and drank and hummed to the carols playing on the sound system. Jack was busy catching up with all the elves he knew.

About an hour in, a phone rang and one of the elves went to answer it.

"Hey everybody!" he shouted for the room to hear, "Mrs. Claus had a baby boy!"

There were cheers all around.

"Dr. Hodgins, Mrs. Claus wants you and Miss Montenegro to come up and meet the baby," he told Jack.

"I'll show you the way," Debbie offered. They walked behind her to the hospital wing, which looked like a luxury private hospital to Angela.

"Jack!"

A pretty lady lying on comfy bed stretched out her hands in invitation to Jack. He leaned in and hugged her tightly.

"And I finally get to meet the famous Angela," Chelsea took Angela's hand, "I'm Chelsea. Nice to meet you. I've heard about you from Benjamin."

"I'm famous?" Angela laughed.

"Where's the baby?" Jack asked.

"Here."

They tuned to see Benjamin holding his son in his arms.

"Christopher Nicholas Claus," he announced, "It was Chelse's idea to go traditional, not mine."

"He's a beauty, sir," said Debbie.

"I know." Benjamin smiled, "You wanna hold him?"

"Yes!" Angela jumped at the chance. She held out her hands for little Christopher and Benjamin handed him over.

"He's precious," Angela cooed. Jack watched the newborn over her shoulder.

"I guess he's gonna be the next Santa huh?" he said.

"Oh, wow! Am I really holding the next Santa in my arms?" Angela squealed, "I'm so honoured!"

"Well, yes. Unless something happens to me before he's old enough," Benjamin explained, "In that case, it's either you or..."

"Belle," both he and Jack said.

"Who's Belle?" Angela asked.

"Their cousin is Belinda Fisher," Debbie told her, eyes popping excitedly, "She has to take over as Santa, either her or Jack."

"The Belinda Fisher?" Angela was equally excited, "As in the actress?"

Debbie nodded wildly.

Angela turned to face Jack, You're related to Santa_ and _Zia March from _American_ _Superhero_? And you fail to relate this info to me?"

"It's cool, huh?" Chelsea was beaming with excitement, "She was here for Thanksgiving a few years ago, and I was all thumbs the whole day!"

"Your family is so cool!" Angela told Jack.

"Says the lady with the rock star for a dad," he told her back.

"Come on. I'll take you two back to DC," said Benjamin.

Angela handed the baby over to Chelsea and they went to the white SUV. After another really short trip, they stopped in the Jeffersonian parking lot, which was considerably emptier than it was hours ago. The moon shone brightly, illuminating the snow.

"Thank you guys again," Benjamin patted Jack's shoulder.

"Glad to help out," said Jack.

"_Really _glad. Seriously," said Angela from the back.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself," Benjamin told her, "Oh. I almost forgot."

Magically, a box appeared beside Benjamin. Angela grinned as he handed it to her.

"You enjoy doing that," Jack said to him.

"Remember, don't open it till Christmas," Benjamin warned.

Jack checked his watch, "It is Christmas. It has been for a minute."

"Goody!" Angela tore into the box and took out...

"Jewelry?" Angela held up a pendant, a pair of diamond-studded wings, "I love it, Benjamin, thank you!"

"And you," Benjamin handed a bigger box to Jack.

"Whoa," Jack unearthed a brown leather jacket, "Whoa!" he said again when he turned it around and saw his surname embellished on the back.

"Merry Christmas, you two," said Benjamin, "Now get out of my car so I can go home and see my son."

"Yes sir," Angela leaned forward and kissed Benjamin's cheek before getting out of the car, "Merry Christmas."

"See you, man," Jack told his cousin and got out too.

As Benjamin drove off, Jack looked at Angela. She still hadn't gotten into her car.

"Well, see you after Christmas," he said.

"Yeah. Have a good day," she said back.

They continued to stare. Then Jack walked around her car, enveloped her in his arms and hugged her tight.

"I think I'll miss you."

"Yeah?" she breathed before hugging back.

"Yeah."

They pulled back and he walked back to his car, got in and drove off.

Angela drove home. When she got there, she saw a present under her tree that was familiar. Smiling at the memory of making the delivery to her own house, she took off her gloves and walked to her kitchen.

"Hey!"

Spinning around, Angela saw a sleep-ridden Roxy standing in the doorway, still in her jeans, looking upset.

"Where have you been? It's a minute to one. What are you wearing? You didn't have on that yesterday. I was so worried, you didn't even call."

Angela grinned, "I can't tell you. Just know I had to make some important deliveries."

"Okay..." Roxy nodded and waited for more.

"Sorry," Angela shrugged, "The rest is confidential. Merry Christmas!"

"Uh huh. You too," Roxy stared as Angela bounded happily into the living room, a plate of cookies in one hand, and a glass of milk in the other.

* * *

I know you loved it, so you can just click the review button and do all your praise there.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own it. All the better. I can't be trusted around shiny things.

* * *

"Who wants coffee?"

Angela, Brennan and Cam looked at Booth with blank expressions. He flashed them a big smile, it in itself cajoling them.

"Come on! It's Christmas Eve Eve!" he exclaimed, "We gotta celebrate! Come on, we can get something warm to drink, go to the park and watch the concert, talk. It'll be fun!"

"We have work to do, Booth." Brennan told him, "May we remind you that this is an important public official on our examination table. The FBI needs us to solve this as soon as possible."

"And plus, it's too cold to go outside," Angela complained.

"Come on. Please?" Booth put on puppy dog eyes, focused them on Cam, "it won't take that long. We'll be back here in no time. Come on guys, please. I just wanna spend time with my three favourite women in the world..."

They rolled their eyes simultaneously, then turned to each other.

"He's not gonna stop till we give in, is he?" Cam asked.

"Nope." Angela answered.

"He can be incessant when he wants to be," Brennan added, "So we go?"

"We go," said Angela and Cam.

"Yes! I love you guys!" Booth shouted.

"Oh, please," they all said.

..........................................................

They were laughing and talking together, walking from the coffee shop towards the park a few minutes later. Cam and Angela had their arms linked and were sipping their drinks and walking a little ahead if Brennan and Booth. Brennan had her head on his shoulder and he had an arm around her.

"The park's gonna be packed," Cam announced.

"Yeah," said Angela, "But we can deal with that, can't we?"

"Angela," Brennan said in a warning voice.

"Oops," Angela covered her mouth and looked at Booth. He had no idea what she was talking about, but her reaction and Cam and Brennan's expressions made him a little suspicious.

"Why are we keeping it secret anyway?" Angela said, abandoning Cam and walking ahead of everyone. She turned and walked backwards, looking at them, "What's the sense having something and you never use it? Look at this," she pointed at a lone Christmas tree leaning up against a wall. It looked like had been abandoned, "We could just..."

Booth's mouth dropped open, as Angela waved her hand and the tree lit up with tiny unnatural lights.

"Angela!" Cam and Brennan shouted. She giggled.

"Come on, guys, try it, it's fun!" Angela's hand was guiding a string of frozen water around the tree. Suddenly a snowball hit her. She spun and looked at Brennan, "What was that for?"

When Booth looked at his partner, it wasn't the anger on her face that surprised him, but the ball of snow spinning in midair beside her.

"We agreed, Angela! No using this power until we were certain what was happening!"

Cam pointed, "Look who's talking!"

The ball fell and Brennan looked embarrassed, "Sorry."

"What's going on?" asked Booth. He wondered if he had fallen asleep at his desk, and hadn't gone to the Jeffersonian at all.

"Uh, we don't know either," Cam told him, "It just started happening."

"And it's fun! Look!"

Angela waved her hand and the snow melted, then she waved it again, and the snow turned to ice. She went sliding on it.

"I swear, I could not skate this well before."

"Stop!" Cam shouted and the ice turned back to snow, causing Angela to trip, "Can't you see how abnormal this is?"

"The evidence for humans developing superhuman abilities is nonexistent," Brennan said.

"Okay. What if only Booth knows?" Angela said, "Angela said. And a few other select people. Like maybe Zach and Hodgins. And how about Sweets?"

"Sweets will tell Daisy and Daisy has no control over her mouth," Brennan told her.

"This is weird," Booth had been pinching himself while they talked.

"Do you know how we feel? This morning I was looking for my keys and lifted my couch. No hands," said Cam.

"I made an entire _pie_, no hands! And it still came out great!" Angela told her.

"Well, until we find out what's going on, we have to keep this between us...and Seeley," said Cam, "And Hodgins and Zach."

"Goodie! I've been meaning to show Zach something!"

"But nobody after that, Angela. Promise." Cam wagged her fingers at Angela's beaming face.

"Yeah, yeah. So let's go play with the minds of all the people in the park!" Angela said.

"We can't do that again, Angela! That is an invasion," Brennan warned her, "We only did it to Dr. Morrison because he was being stubborn... and wrong."

"It was fun," Cam giggled.

Booth watched them walking down the street in awe. What on Earth just happened?"

_Come on Booth... _

"Coming," he went after them.

* * *

Yeah, I'm crazy.

Review before the straightjacket guys get here!


	8. Chapter 8

Christmas time is here. And that means the Twisted breaks out again! Woo! Ain't it great?

**Disclaimer:** If I did, there would be more crazy episodes like the Double Death of the Dearly Departed.

* * *

Angela fixed her hair in the store window, ruffling the feathers of her angel wings. She was going to the Christmas party over at the other end of the store, and she hoped that her friends hadn't been sold off in the rush on the store last night. It would be really sad if they all got sold and left her.

Extending her pretty wings, Angela took flight, coasting over the main floor of the toy store. Heading straight for the big pink dollhouse, already aglow and full of partying toys.

As she set herself down, she immediately spotted a familiar face. She walked over to Cam, the dress-up doll, in one of her many pretty dresses. Cam smiled and met her halfway.

"Now here's a face I haven't seen in a while," she said, giving Angela a hug.

"Oh, you know, they put me in the store window every year around this time," Angela sighed, "I always think some little girl's gonna see me and want me."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Cam laughed, taking her hand and leading her toward the dollhouse.

Inside was jam packed with toys big and small. There was cake from the Easy Bake ovens and bubbly soda served in the small tea set. There was music from the toy radio, and all the toys were dancing and having a good time.

"Anybody else from our crowd left back?" Angela asked Cam.

"Oh yeah! A few. Look over there."

Angela looked and saw the Wilderness Man action figure named Jack standing near the staircase. She had had a crush on him for a while, and she was really glad that he hadn't been sold.

Near him, she saw the Sailor dolls Sweets and Zach. They were talking animatedly, or at least Sweets was. Zach was nodding his head.

"Hey, there's the girl I wanted to see!"

Angela turned towards the voice, "Oh thank God you're still here!"

She jumped into Booth the army doll's arms and he lifted her off the ground with his hug.

"We missed you over on our shelf," he told her, putting her down, "Me and Bones have been having a really hard time playing poker without our favourite player."

"Oh, you're sweet," Angela pinched his perfect chin with her delicate doll's fingers. But then her hand fell.

"Booth, where's Bones?"

He paused, and Angela's breath held as she prepared for the worst.

"We had a close call today. This little girl came to pick her up, but her mother bought her a big dollhouse instead. Lucky kid."

Angela's breath came out in a happy sigh, "She's here?"

"Right over there," Cam pointed out the brown-haired doll in the blue lab coat that showed she was a serious Scientist Doll. She was standing near the radio, sipping her soda.

"Bren!" Angela ran over to her, her wings nudging people on the dance floor. She crashed into her best friend, squeezing her with all her might.

"Angela!" Brennan hugged back, "I haven't seen you in such a long time!"

"Oh honey, I'm so glad you didn't get sold! I mean, not that that wouldn't be great, but I would miss you so much and..."

"I would feel similarly had you been sold, Angela. I watched you from our shelf for the whole time you were in the window. I was certain you would go away this time!"

"I'm glad we both stayed back! It wouldn't be Christmas without you," Angela hugged her friend again.

A song came on on the radio that had Angela screaming with joy.

"I love this song! Let's go dance!"

Brennan allowed her best friend to drag her into the midsts of the dancing toys and they danced, enjoying themselves. Booth came and dragged Brennan away and Angela coaxed the two sailor dolls into dancing with her.

"You two!" Cam came over, dragging Jack behind her, "The store people forgot to let the water out of the Deluxe Barbie swimming pool! You wanna go for a swim?"

"Hells yeah!" Angela shouted, "How 'bout it, guys?"

They all ran outside, hand in hand, running and jumping into the toy pool.


End file.
